Jami the Fast Food Pusher

Yes, I know that it's not good for you. I know that it's full of fat and salt and sugar. But, I am telling you this as a fact - McDonald's food cures a variety of ailments. It's just true. Here's the thing. When I have a cold, or feel one coming on. I use my 5 point plan of defeating the cold:

1. Zicam
2. Steamy showers
3. Rest
4. Cold medicine
5. Double-cheeseburger and an alcoholic beverage for dinner.

Works every time. If I do this for one day, I will be noticeably better the next. Ask the Husband, it's the truth.

Last week, I realized that when I have a stomach ailment that, if I get an order of McNuggets (and fries if I haven't eaten in more than about 18 hours) as soon as the idea of food doesn't make me nauseous, even if I still feel bad, the nuggets fix the problem as I digest. It's just true. It's one more reason I don't want to get pregnant. If I have morning sickness I'll have to eat nuggets every day and have the first baby born with high cholesterol and a desire to dunk his breast milk.

Now, I didn't see Supersize Me, and don't really have the desire to. I don't see how it can be news that if you eat at Mickey-D's thrice daily you will get fat. But, having not seen it, I will venture a guess - that the entire time he was on the all-Mac diet, he didn't have a cold or the flu. Right? Of course not. He was eating the Magic Common Ailment Cure foods daily. Fat, but not ill. Oh, and one of my friends told me that nothing cures a hangover faster than a Quarter Pounder with Cheese and a Coke.

I'm guessing that they can't advertise this fact because it will spill the beans that they are putting some sort of magic addictive deliciousness drugs in the food.