Jami's Two Part Series of Having Friends - Part Two

If you didn't read yesterday's, you might want to start there. Either way . . Part Two: It's Important to Have Not-Mommy Friends Not-Mommy Friends (NMF's) can either have no children, yet, or children but their youngest is an adult. You need Not-Mommy Friends because you have to be able to go out sometimes and they are way easier to schedule with than Mommy-Friends. I remember, I do, before kids. A friend would call me up and say "Wanna go see a movie?" and I'd say "Sure!" and meet her at the theatre. Maybe go to dinner. Now, it goes more like "You want to see a movie?" "What day? I have to see if the Husband is working and if not then I have to find a babysitter" "Okay, I have a sitter for Thursday night or Sunday afternoon" "Okay, Sunday afternoon I can do if we can see a movie that starts no later than 2 and come right home without even watching the credits". Aeire, who I have mentioned before, I'm certain, is a great NMF. She still has obligations and schedules and stuff, but if I want to go hang out, we can find a time. She doesn't have to deal with a sitter or cancel because her kid threw up. We don't have to figure out if we need the car with the carseat in it. Plus, she's totally cool. You need Non-Mommy Friends because you need someone to remind you that there are other things to talk about besides children. Sure, you can mention your children or what you did that day, but your NMF's aren't going to stand for an hour of discussion of Potty Training Issues or the co-sleeping debate. They will remind you that there are books and movies and world events and fashion and whatever else. You need that. Turn off the mommy-side of the brain for awhile and remember who the rest of you is. You need Non-Mommy Friends because they are usually the ones you've known the longest. When you become a parent, it seems that most of the new friends you make are through parent-stuff. The NMF's you keep are usually the ones you had before the little ones came along. They're the ones who threw your shower, even though they didn't know what the heck half the stuff you registered for is. They are a part of who you are now because they were a part of making you that person. And they'll probably end up being Mommy-Friends at some point, so don't let them go now. You need them more now - they'll need you more then. It's what friendship is about. It's important to have Non-Mommy friends. Here's a shout out to the people I love - my friends of the Mommy and Not-Mommy variety. Each of you is special and wonderful and makes my life as rich as it is. Thanks, God bless you - I love you!