It's All in My Head

I had a post idea. I did. But now it's gone and the only thing to blame is: Mommy Brain. Hadn't heard of Mommy Brain? It's a common ailment afflicting women with children, especially little ones. Caused by a combination of lack of sleep, talking to infants/toddlers all day and listening to kiddie music,which sticks in your head worse than any 80s One Hit Wonder ever could, Mommy Brain makes otherwise normal intelligent women do stuff like fill sippy cups with coffee or forget their own phone numbers. Plenty of people claim there's no such thing. These people have no children, or pay large armies of nannies to care for them. Think I'm making it all up? Try reading this actual conversation I had with my son aloud: Eddie: "Ball!" Me:"Yup, that's a ball." Eddie: "Ball!" Me:"Yes, can you roll the ball?" Eddie: "Ball!" Me:"Or throw the ball - throw the ball to Mommy" Eddie: "Ball!" Me:"Who's on that ball? Is that Spiderman on the ball?" Eddie: "Ball!" Me:"Yes, I see the ball." Eddie: "Ball!" Now, read that out loud over and over for the next 2 hours, then try to do simple math problems. Do it for 6ish hours a day (allowing pauses for eating and occasional naps - for the baby, not you) 7 days a week. And, let's talk about kiddie music, briefly. The more cheerful and stupid it is, the more likely it is to get permanently stuck in your head. If you don't think singing the "Let's Get On the Bus" song for hours a day messes with your sanity, you haven't tried it. Also, toddlers find things to do that you'd never have thought of. I find myself saying things like "Stop trying to feed the dog a crayon!" The poor fish were starving this morning because Eddie insisted that their food should NOT go into the aquarium, but instead must be carefully displayed in a very certain formation like some sort of art project. Right now, as I type this, my son is applying chapstick to his toes and making yummy noises. With all the benefit concerts, why hasn't there been one for Mommy Brain? There's no cure, but there IS treatment, If we raies enough, each mommy suffering from this dread ailment would be provided an at-risk teenage girl (who has been subjected to training). Several days and/or nights a week, this girl would be a Mommy Helper, changing the 15th poopy diaper of the day, getting up when the baby screams at 3 am for no apparent reason, cleaning the applesauce off the TV. It would cut down on teenage pregnancies AND help reduce Mommy Brain. Now I have to go, Eddie is trying to apply the chapstick to the dog, who doesn't even have lips.