Jami is Almost Out of Bread

Tomorrow I will be stopping by the grocery store at some point in my errands. I do this because we are almost out of bread. It's not just a fluke, we are somehow, perpetually almost out of bread. We have two states of being here at our house Almost Out of Bread and Out of Bread. That's it. I buy bread. I bring it home and put it in the bread cabinet. Then I walk out of the kitchen and the Bread Gnomes tiptoe in and eat all our bread. There can be no other explanation. Okay, sure, Eddie eats an estimated 14 sandwiches a day (either grilled cheese or PBJ and occasionally steak-um) but still. I am convinced that if the Wonder Bread truck backed itself up to the kitchen door and dumped the entire load into my kitchen to the point where you couldn't get past the fridge because of all the bread, the next morning when I came downstairs for breakfast, we would be Almost Out of Bread. There would be a one folded-over plastic bag, twist tie lost, with the 2 end crusts and a single, lonely non-crust piece left. So, I'll see you tomorrow, at Giant Eagle. I'll be in the bread aisle.