Jami the Crazy-Person Mommy

I love MOPS (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers). I needed MOPS when I started being a full-time mommy because I really thought I was losing my mind until I got into a group of other mommies with little ones and discovered that it's supposed to feel like this. One question several of the moms I know ask is "What if I'm not being a good mom?" I've had a lot of jobs, and there are times in all of them, that I've known that I wasn't doing the very, very best 100% of myself excellent work that I could be doing. You know what I mean, you've done it, too. And it's one of the reasons I've always said that I'd never take a job where if I messed up, someone dies (doctor, police, air traffic controller). When you have a child, if you mess up - they might not die, but you can seriously screw up a kid, you know? One of my favorite MOPS moments was when one of the moms gathered up her courage and said "Uh, does anyone ever find themselves . . . . screaming like a maniac?" A long, awkward silence followed, then erupted into laughter. Because we all have. If you have a toddler and you've never snapped and shouted like a lunatic, you're either on serious drugs or a mute. Toddlers seem to be designed to make you lose whatever marbles you have left after surviving the baby-phase. So how do you know if you're a good mom? I think if you're asking the question, you're on the right track. If you feel bad after screaming "IF YOU GO NEAR THE DOG AGAIN I'M PUTTING ALL OF YOUR TOYS IN THE ATTIC AND YOU'LL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN!", you're probably aware that you sounded nuts and that's not great. It's not that you never yell, because no one can live up to that. It's that you know it's wrong, you apologize to your child and you try really hard to do it as little as humanly possible. In my opinion, it's when you're sure that everything you do is right and it's your kid's fault that you holler all the time and cuss them out, that's when you're not being a good mom. It's the asking that answers the question.